Teacher Gray: The Inferiority Complex Deeply Rooted in Chinese People
When I started learning Chinese, I quickly noticed a deep-seated sense of inferiority among many modern Chinese people. Most of the people I initially met belonged to China's middle and upper-middle classes. When they took me out, if any "Third World" aspects were exposed, they would feel embarrassed, as if they couldn't let tourists see that side of China. They were also quite obviously ashamed of the lacking manners of some of their compatriots. By then I already knew that there was a huge disparity in the country regarding economic and educational conditions, so I didn't form any negative opinions of my friends because of this. But what they made me feel was, "I don't want you to think we Chinese people are all like that."
I also realized early on that although this group rarely spoke ill of China out loud, whether it was their choice of university, what they bought, or where they went on vacation, their choices gave me the impression that they felt foreign countries were better than China––even though none of them dared to say so directly.
Everyone has different ways of resolving spiritual conflict. You can accept that your cultural background and living conditions have both good and bad aspects, and deal with it calmly. You can make good money and low-key enjoy the good things abroad, and that's totally fine. Whether you prefer using an Apple phone or a Huawei phone is your own choice, but many people seem unaware: why do some people make you feel like you must take a side? Why are Chinese elites so afraid of being labeled as "worshiping foreign things"? This is what's truly worth pondering.
Recently, the music I make has brought me into contact with the most obvious manifestation of this inferiority, which is China's so-called "patriots." When I publish a commentary, no matter what tone I use or how cautious my expression is, they will curse me out, calling me a "white left sanctimonious person" who is trying to lecture them. But I wasn't speaking condescendingly; I was just sharing my observations. If I'm wrong somewhere, you shouldn't feel offended anyway? After all, why would a wrong comment or idea make you so angry? And why are you so quick to put me in such a high position? Is it because you inherently have this emotion deep down in your bones? That is: your country is forever inferior to the West. Does this also mean that you as a person are forever inferior to Westerners?
Through their behavior, these people have further proven the accuracy of my point. When I said, "There are aspects of modern Chinese culture that lag behind the modern civilized world," they cursed me as a "white pig." But I actually feel that such comments are rather helpful to my conclusion.
Precisely because Chinese little pinks grow up in this unhealthy, inferior emotional environment, they must find ways to vent it. But ironically, no one can "insult China" better than they do, and similarly, no one can better show the whole world how severe the inferiority complex of ordinary Chinese people is. They pick bones in eggs abroad, checking airline websites to see whether Taiwan is listed as a "country" or a "province," seeing if their universities have invited "anti-China intellectuals" to speak. I recently even saw a video of a little pink staying in a hotel, meticulously searching through a bunch of flags to see if the People's Republic of China was included. How boring!
But the most regrettable thing is that it's not just the elites who "worship foreign things" or the little pinks who "hate the US and Japan," I eventually discovered that this sense of inferiority still echoes even within the "anti-CCP" circles. When I thought my criticisms of Chinese people were too sharp, some people said I wasn't harsh enough. As a musician, my great hope for the future is that I can see music liberate people. My strongest hope is that I can live to see the day when China truly awakens. But this liberation is not limited to bringing down the Communist Party, which is already an inevitable reality. More importantly, I hope everyone can see that we are not Chinese people; we are just human beings. And we are not subordinates of that legendary history and culture spanning thousands of years, because all of us only arrived here not long ago. To me, that is what is called an awakening.