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"Qin II Must Die" mysteriously appears in the Xi Jinping Works section! State-owned enterprise bosses banned from leaving Beijing? Hu Ge becomes the scapegoat? Feng Xiaogang's movie "Catching Spies" bombs at the box office; Xi Jinping makes a fool of himself during his sneaky visit to Shandong (Old Beijing Teahouse/Episode 1667/2026/06/24)

1# · OP Author：老北京茶館 - 幽默時政 Published：2026-06-26 02:05 Replies：0 Views：259 Permalink：fanzei.net/d_2224gy

The main content of this episode includes: the tight security during Xi Jinping's visit to Lingcheng District, Dezhou, Shandong, which sparked satire; the heated discussion triggered by the appearance of the book "Qin Er Shi Must Die" on a "Red" bookshelf in a bookstore; rumors that middle-level management in state-owned enterprises are required to report before leaving Beijing; and political and social hot topics such as the box office failure of Feng Xiaogang's film "Catching Spies" and the resulting discussions about the "winter" of the entertainment industry.

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So, today, June 24, 2026, Beijing time, Dezhou, Shandong was filled with the sound of drums, gongs, and firecrackers, with black flags waving—what a bizarre scene. Hearing "Five Finger Mountain, Six Finger Sea" might leave one confused. Oh, right, what's with the "black flags waving"? Once the black command flags are raised, the Shandong people who died unjustly during Xi the Steamed Bun's three years of pandemic chaos are lining up from the underworld to launch their final all-out assault on the General Secretary they've been thinking about day and night. It's over; the underworld soldiers are legally claiming his life, and the Steamed Bun's life is hanging by a thread. On June 24, CCP leader Xi Jinping visited Xiyujia Village in Lingcheng District, Dezhou, Shandong. Lingcheng—the "Ling" of tomb (lingmu). Now you understand why the underworld soldiers are lining up to claim his life. Puns aside, tomb, Xiyujia Village in Lingcheng District—the village party secretary Zhang Erga said, "Lingcheng means tomb, so shouldn't our Xiyujia Village just let the Steamed Bun 'ride a crane to the west' (die)?" This village secretary knows how to scare the Steamed Bun, bringing up exactly what shouldn't be mentioned; the shock to the imperial carriage is certain.

The extras arranged by the Shandong Provincial Party Committee and Government were too enthusiastic. Upon seeing the General Secretary, they suddenly raised both arms above their heads in unison and burst into thunderous applause. If you listen closely, maybe there were even shouts of "Premier, hello! Premier Keqiang, rest in peace!" The underworld soldiers of Premier Li are taking advantage of the chaos to scare the "real man." My god, a pungent North Korean-style wind hit my face; it caused severe physical discomfort. It is said that a lackey from the Shandong Provincial Party Committee was completely baffled and kept asking the hosts, "Why are these villagers holding their hands so high? Aren't they tired?" What did the villagers say? The villagers replied, "Not tired at all, because we were all locked inside our homes lying flat on the kang. Those who could go out to welcome the Steamed Bun and raise their hands above their heads to clap were all party members and cadres transferred from various villages." Pfft, do you think this sycophantic performance to fool the Steamed Bun is cringeworthy? The village heads, party secretaries, and women's directors who participated in the applause-and-loyalty team all said it wasn't cringeworthy, just a bit tiring—their arms couldn't handle it after holding them up for so long. Who told you to hold your hands so high while clapping? The Provincial Party Committee required it; the posture had to be unified, and both hands had to be raised above the head. The police officers said that both hands had to be placed where they could be seen with the naked eye. What does that mean? They were afraid that the commoners might suddenly pull out a Type 38 rifle while clapping and wipe them all out in one go.

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You can receive a steady stream of news and jokes. To pick up where we left off, I have to give a bad review to that short video of the Shandong village cadres welcoming Xi the Steamed Bun. Why? Out of a huge group of carefully selected Party members, after watching for a long time, there was only one primary school student, Jiahao in gray, who learned the posture of jumping while clapping. Jiahao, everyone else was slacking off, just clapping without doing standing jumps. The invincible Supreme General of the Universe, Kim Jong-un, would say it looked very perfunctory—not crying or wailing, not heart-wrenching enough, seriously cutting corners. Just clapping without jumping—the flavor is all wrong. The General Secretary urgently stopped them, saying, 'Don't jump! Who knows who might jump and step on a timer-bomb button? Then nothing would taste good anymore.' I was wondering why no one at the scene had a mobile phone; it's because they were afraid there might be a timer-bomb in the phones, so they were all confiscated. The General Secretary has 'four self-confidences' regarding the idea that 'there are always treacherous people wanting to harm me.' It seems that the civilized act of 'watching monkeys' has already started in Peng Liyuan's hometown of Shandong. It's a must. Old Xi thinks to himself, 'I am also someone who has struggled at the grassroots level. Faking things and putting on a show to fool the inspection teams from above is our Party's consistent fine tradition.' He's actually quite proud of it. Don't look at me chatting with those above; they are clapping for their lives, but who knows how they are cursing me in their hearts? The Steamed Bun has this self-awareness, seriously suspecting that people are secretly discussing the central leadership in their hearts, never straying from the topic of reversing the car. They've watched the CCTV 'big pants' building a hundred times; can't they change to something fresh? What to do? It would be better to say that phrase: 'The whole village has been waiting for the lecherous hands to arrive.' Are you going to lift the lid? You can't; it will explode. Alright, this trip by Old Xi to his wife Peng Liyuan's hometown, the nest of the Shandong faction, is superficially harmonious, but behind the scenes, he is still letting them fight each other to the death. When the nest is overturned, no egg remains intact. Peng Liyuan's cousin, widely rumored in the underworld, Ma Xingrui, has seen another old partner, former Shenzhen CPPCC Chairman Dai Beifang, receive the 'double expulsion.' The old Shenzhen subordinates are in a state of panic, and the Shandong faction is in jeopardy. Xi's visit to Shandong is a case of swallowing his broken teeth along with the blood.

Alright, let's see what our tea friends think. Tea friends, why do you think that during Xi Jinping's inspection of Shandong, none of the so-called villagers clapping in the village had mobile phones, and they all held their hands above their heads? Here are the options: 1. The countryside is poor and they don't have phones; 2. They are afraid of assassination, so phones are not allowed; 3. They are afraid of secret filming leaking Xi's whereabouts; 4. Holding hands above the head to clap makes Xi feel at ease. Hurry up and type the number in the comments section.

Well, Fang Bu Fang Bookstore is closing, what's wrong with the bookstore again? Something incredible happened, Liu Zhuo, a huge incident occurred at the bookstore. I knew we couldn't avoid it. In front of the special display shelf for the Steamed Bun series of red books, "The Second Emperor of Qin Must Die" has mysteriously appeared. It's terrifying to think about, and even more terrifying not to. Heavens, who put it there? It couldn't have died a more fitting death. The General Secretary frowns, what does this mean? "The Second Emperor of Qin Must Die" appeared right on the special display shelf for Xi Jinping Thought on Socialism with Chinese Characteristics for a New Era, with its red background and gold lettering. Pfft, this person will take things personally. So, a bookstore inside the Great Firewall became famous because of a very special photo—no, not just famous, it caused a crater, bombing Zhongnanhai. There, right in front of the red background and gold characters "Special Display for Xi Era Thought on Socialism with Chinese Characteristics," rows of "Xi Jinping: The Governance of China" were neatly stacked, and in the most conspicuous position, mysteriously placed, was Ma Boyong's 2026 new book, "The Second Emperor of Qin Must Die." It was so shocking! First, there was Xi Jinping's nickname, Emperor Xi the Dead, and now "The Second Emperor of Qin Must Die" placed right on the shelf of Xi's works. The title is like a sharp dagger thrusting straight into Xi Jinping's heart. You must know that shortly after Qin Er Shi Huhai succeeded to the throne, Chen Sheng and Wu Guang raised the banner of revolt, shaking the empire. Then Zhao Gao called a deer a horse, throwing the imperial court into chaos, and the Great Qin Empire, which had conquered the six states, plunged from its peak into the abyss. In modern terms, holding a winning hand and playing it terribly, which completely matches the 13-year trajectory of the Steamed Bun Party-State. Therefore, netizens' imaginations completely ran wild. Someone threw out a second book, "Chongzhen: The Doomed Emperor Who Diligently Governed." Making blunder after blunder, every step wrong, the more "diligent" he was, the faster the country fell. He kept going to Shandong to stir up trouble, and crucially, the book cover had a hangman's noose looped tightly around the neck of the character "Chong" in Chongzhen, getting tighter and tighter the more it was pulled. And didn't you mention the author's name is "Chen Wutong"? It sounds just like the "armed reunification" that the Steamed Bun is constantly obsessed with. This homophonic pun has people seriously suspecting the author is Lai Ching-te's own first cousin, thoroughly startling a flock of stub-tailed quails from the little pond. These two books—one is a short-lived emperor who "must die," and the other is a doomed ruler whose "busier he is, the faster he perishes." One step forward is a cliff, one step back is a cesspool. Fearing wolves in front and tigers behind, why won't you turn left or right? It's simply not allowed. In 2022, a reckless bookstore displayed books just like you said: a book with a black cover and white text, "Genius is on the Left, Madman is on the Right," with Marx's "Das Kapital" on the left and Xi Jinping's "The Governance of China" on the right. Oh yeah, Emperor Steamed Bun raises his hand urgently: I report, Marx is also a madman, his "Capitalization" is complete nonsense, both of them are madmen. No matter how the Communist Party glosses over and fabricates history, history always manages to find respect and restoration on the bookshelf. Therefore, no matter how the modern Chongzhen tries to block Beijing residents from going to Jingshan Hill to bow, he cannot stop the footsteps of history. The General Secretary glares: whether you can stop it or not is a matter of ability; whether you try to stop it is a matter of attitude. I must straighten out my attitude.

Oh no, Emperor Steamed Bun wants to prevent party officials jumping ship from fleeing Beijing. Not only party officials, but even big bosses of state-owned enterprises now have to report before leaving the capital! Look at this, what did self-media commentator Yin Ke say? It's nothing new. Because of the possibility of fleeing abroad, multiple middle-level managers of state-owned enterprises in Beijing have already left the mainland via the China-Myanmar and China-Vietnam borders. Netizens are even offering little tricks for Old Xi: Beijing should build another ring of city walls, and the Jinyiwei should search everyone leaving the city gates, especially the emperor's favorites. It would be best to castrate them directly and unify them into eunuch formations, then you can sleep soundly. The Steamed Bun looks pleasantly surprised: Where are Cai Qi and Wang Yi? Lead by example and get to work.

Well, times have changed and danger lurks everywhere. Director Feng Xiaogang spent thirty years sharpening a sword, only for it to come out rusted. He said that his new film, *Catching Spies*, had its movie adaptation rights purchased more than thirty years ago. Director Feng never expected that as soon as the new film came out, its art would become a large-scale traffic accident performance art, and it was even assisted by Han Hong, a folk philanthropist and singer with an excellent reputation. Netizens didn't hold back at all. Right after Teacher Han Hong's appeal for votes for Director Feng came out, a new brand of instant noodles also appeared, named "Walk Noodles" (zou ge mian), complete with an advertising slogan: "Beijing's 20 million people are suffering, so just go for it." Instant noodles endorsed by the Steamed Bun also came out, named "Give Face" (gei ge mian), with the slogan: "The people's expectations are the driving force behind our instant noodles." The Steamed Bun whispered to himself: As long as you slap the words "people's expectations" on it, not eating it means refusing to give face, and you'll go to jail. After going to jail for not eating it, you'll still have to eat his instant noodles inside. Don't you think General Secretary's domestic circulation method is brilliant? Getting back to Director Feng's *Catching Spies*, over the past couple of days even overseas X platforms have been arguing like crazy, especially since Director Feng had indeed poured huge expectations into it. According to domestic reports, the movie adaptation rights for *Catching Spies* were bought over thirty years ago, filming officially started two years ago, it wrapped up a year ago, and then it suffered through censorship until the release date poster and official announcement were finally published on June 12, with screenings beginning in mainland theaters on June 19. According to NetEase News reports, as of June 24, Maoyan Professional Edition's latest box office projection for *Catching Spies* is 131 million RMB. With an investment of over 200 million RMB, this theatrical film starring Hu Ge and Lei Jiayin can only hover around a few million RMB in daily box office revenue, meaning that a massive box office flop has become an irreversible reality. On June 19, Dragon Boat Festival, 14 new films were released, 13 of which were domestic movies, and all of them lost to the sole foreign hostile force—the Hollywood animated film *Toy Story 5*. Meanwhile, the domestic film *Catching Spies* subsequently lost to *A Letter to Grandma* in box office numbers over the following days, lagging behind *The Letter* in comprehensive box office share, box office percentage, and screening percentage. The box office crashed and people were polarized, with all kinds of rumors and gossip flying around. Even lead actor Hu Ge got dragged into bad luck, with various entertainment news outlets frantically analyzing things like Hu Ge being a "box office poison," with only 3 movies breaking 100 million RMB in his 22-year career, and the lowest being a mere 1.48 million, blah blah blah. Don't you think Hu Ge is unlucky? Others analyzed that no matter what, Hu Ge successfully broke into the film circle through *Catching Spies* and officially advanced to a major film star, making Teacher Hu a beneficiary. Some even detailed Hu Ge's rise to fame roadmap, only to discover that Hu Ge was never on the traffic star route in the first place, as only traffic stars care about high or low box office numbers. Director Feng might as well say: Can I cry my heart out in the toilet? Yes, you can. Actually, there's still a reason why the box office collapsed. Netizen Li Mosha put it this way: Why is this movie so repulsive? Because it touches upon our nation's traumatic memories. Back in that era, using "catching spies" as an imaginary enemy resulted in countless people being falsely accused and losing their lives, countless people living lives worse than death, and countless families being torn apart. Many people still carry unhealed scars in their hearts to this day, and Feng Xiaogang is smiling and saying, "I see that scar of yours, and it's still bleeding, hahaha." Let's put it this way: Feng Xiaogang might not necessarily be smiling, but shooting this theme right now is truly out of touch with the times. I've seen too many netizens and tea lovers leaving comments saying that just looking at the title of this movie makes them feel disgusted. I don't know how the movie is, but purely because of this title, I won't watch it. That's right, similar comments can be seen in many comment sections. Sydney Daddy, a self-media commentator, posted saying that he read a few reviews and felt that this film is very likely a subtle satire of "catching spies" and its associated ideology, only to find out that everyone is fucking sick of it. A netizen replied underneath: You're right, the foundation is satire; the big spy who caused families to be destroyed over catching spies ends up as a wealthy merchant, which makes it blatantly obvious that it's an intentional critique. But after all, the surface title carries a pinkish hue. The problem is that everyone currently hates anything associated with pink. Why does everyone hate anything associated with pink? Because that is the painful, near-death memory of a generation, or even two or three generations of Chinese people. It is the scar of the CCP teasing and tormenting Chinese people. Chinese people already loathe the CCP to the extreme; they have no heart left to peel back their own scars for appreciation. Even if you are being satirical, Chinese people already feel violated. If that's really the case, some people actually try to put themselves in Feng Xiaogang's shoes, saying that Feng Xiaogang's past remarks actually negated the Communist Party, and shooting this movie feels like a pure attempt to satirize the current environment where everyone is catching spies. But who has the mood to understand his satirical intentions? A netizen said this movie is purely a satire on catching spies, and Feng Xiaogang also wanted to make money with dignity, but the times have changed. Today's young people have been brainwashed to the point of vomiting since childhood, and they just want to watch things devoid of ideology.

Are you trying to make money while standing tall? I really don't know, but a netizen put it clearly: subtle satire no longer works, and since everyone wants to go at it openly, you might as well rename it 'Destroy Cui'.

An entertainment industry practitioner, someone we don't recognize but who seems to have some influence, recorded a video. In the dark, it seems we have heard the future of the entertainment industry that Yu Menglong's casual fans once warned about and predicted. Well, it is well said: after gaining popularity by soliciting goodwill, they only care about traffic and profit, abandoning their original intentions and gratitude. This is indeed the case. Sometimes I wonder, in a trance, are the things that Xiao Yu's soul warned about really coming true step by step? How can you tell? The author of "Currency Storm" reposted a long post allegedly by Damo Junzi, which stated that this round of collapse and destruction of China's film and television industry is a very indecent matter, very indecent. First, this year, a film starring top actors like Huang Bo, Yu Hewei, and Ni Ni had an investment of 100 million yuan but a box office of only 3 million yuan, which directly destroyed the status of these top actors and actresses; they will hardly be able to get any roles in the future, just listen to that. Then, people like Liu Haoran, Cheng Xiao, and Wen Qi publicly shouted that they haven't been able to get roles for a long time and want to work hard, asking everyone to find them for acting jobs; it's that miserable. Then, for Feng Xiaogang's latest film "Catching Spies," Han Hong stood on stage and shouted for the 20 million fellow citizens of Beijing to help spend money to support the box office, but the result was that the whole internet was scolding them, saying they didn't think of us when making money, but now they want us to pay to watch the movie; they were choked by that. Then, Zhang Quanling just jumped to PEVC and started complaining to Lu Yu, saying that the film and television industry cannot just end like this; if all 10,000 cinemas in China go bankrupt, wouldn't all that investment go down the drain? How many people in this industry will lose their rice bowls and jobs forever? Well, there's no way around it; if the Steamed Bun (Xi Jinping) commands you, you just follow along. Damo Junzi said that my intuitive feeling now is that all the big directors, big actors, and big actresses that you used to think were out of reach, high and mighty, with salaries of tens of millions, national husbands and wives, and national idols, are all now shouting that they have no work and no investment. Overnight, they have all been eliminated by the industry; it's quite devastating. There are also some people who have several films they starred in sitting on their hands, with an estimated box office of only 3 to 5 million yuan but an investment of 100 million yuan. If they are released, they will definitely not be able to get any roles for the rest of their lives, and their entire personal value will be completely bankrupt, leaving them in a dilemma. In 2026, overnight, this industry completely, thoroughly, and equally destroyed all companies, all projects, all directors, and all actors. After listening to this, I also feel that the retribution for all the bad things done by the entertainment industry in aiding and abetting evil and dark manipulation has really come. Perhaps the inability to recover sky-high investments is not the most terrifying thing; what is truly terrifying may already be on the way. Let us wait and see. The 2026 Shen Yun season is almost over.

The last region's performances.

5 shows at the Four Seasons Centre for the Performing Arts in Toronto, Canada.

Officially starting tomorrow, June 25th.

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Reminding everyone,

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