Total Collapse Across China! Tesla's New Car Can Fly, the Whole Internet Mocks "Malicious Takeoff" as Leading Chinese Domestic Brands? China's So-Called Lead Crashes, Hurting Xi Jinping's Feelings

This video discusses Tesla's newly released flying prototype car, the Roadster, which has sparked mockery and irony on the Chinese internet regarding "malicious takeoff." It contrasts the differences between China and the U.S. in technological R&D and innovation freedom, while also mentioning recent quality issues such as brake failures in Chinese domestic cars and the associated control of online discourse.

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Today, a video has shocked the whole world, especially the Little Pinks in China. Of course, as a Taiwanese, I find it shocking too, and the Huawei loyalists are having a total meltdown. Musk released a new Tesla that can fly and even climb walls, and it landed precisely on the ground, leaping over several car lengths. I believe that no matter where you are, friends in big cities—whether in Taiwan or Shanghai—are stuck in traffic during their morning commute. For example, friends in Taipei driving to Neihu for work are stuck in terrible traffic. Looking at the cars next to you, have you ever thought about how great it would be if your car could actually fly, like this Tesla? Of course, believe me, there will be relevant regulations coming out, but Musk has made everyone's dream a reality. My god, even Musk himself said at this launch event that this is not AI; we need the live audience to prove that this is not AI or special effects. These clips have shattered the myth that Chinese people can fly. The meme about Chinese people being able to fly comes from that person singing about "grand plans" and just randomly ad-libbing, but then some Little Pinks took it seriously, digging through the Yongle Encyclopedia and even the Compendium of Materia Medica to document stories of Chinese people flying. Of course, otherwise, how did Chang'e fly to the moon? Then there were Little Pinks who had a meltdown, claiming that the driver of that Tesla was Chinese, which is why the car was able to fly. Come on, why doesn't Xi Jinping just fly himself to the U.S. to find Trump instead of taking a plane? There are also clear-headed Chinese netizens who sarcastically remarked, "I've seen BYD cars fly while charging too." Then many people mocked Yu Chengdong of Huawei cars, saying, "Look, they are engaging in 'malicious takeoff'." Others joked that this car would be very useful in Sichuan or the mountain city of Chongqing. But now, Tesla is likely going to "crash" in China again. Why? Because the entire Chinese internet is now spamming this term called "malicious takeoff," claiming it has seriously hurt the feelings of the 1.4 billion Chinese people. Right? While Chinese car companies are researching how to make the screens as big as possible, how to move saunas and home refrigerators into the car, and how to turn the vehicle into a luxury mansion or a high-ranking official's hospital ward, and researching how to keep their brakes from snapping when pressed, the Americans are simply "far ahead" of you—and not just by one generation, but by a whole different level. This gap is huge. It was the same during the Qing Dynasty; when Li Hongzhang first went to New York and rode an elevator, he was terrified. When he first had an X-ray taken in Germany, he was also terrified. Do you know that this is the same era? Let's take everyone to see some reactions from netizens on the other side who are having a meltdown.

You've seen this car, right? Watching it is useless; this car will definitely not be launched in the domestic market. Why? If you launch this car, just think about how toll fees would be paid on the highway, right? They'd just fly right over the toll gates, so how would you collect the toll? Hahaha. Tesla cars by Musk can even fly now. As the executive vice president of new energy vehicles, you better figure out how to intercept him quickly! It's just showing off skills. Our BYD cars can dance, can he do that? People can fly, is that the same thing? Our Xpeng cars could fly long ago; those are propellers, while his are jet-powered. Our Huawei Harmony Intelligent Mobility can open doors remotely, can Musk do that? When Li Yutian drives off a cliff, he can just take off right then and there. @#$%^&*()_)(*&^%$#@. Technology is people-oriented, and this stuff from Matt is just a gimmick. A car that heavy spinning and flying—the people inside would experience such a huge G-force that the human body simply couldn't withstand it. Besides, if it falls and crushes flowers and plants, hitting small animals would also be very bad, so it's nowhere near as practical as remote door opening and an onboard toilet. Oh, Vice President Li, let's be serious. We must maintain a far-ahead lead and not let that kid Musk surpass us by a long shot. Come up with some brilliant moves to strike back at him. Yeah, you guys should develop a car function with a shit-taking capability, to prevent those moments when you suddenly can't find a bathroom. Wow, wouldn't this function be practical and down-to-earth? Huawei's new generation of Mao cars, just releasing this one would be spot on. This person is very good at sarcasm; he knows that you guys actually just like those fancy and showy things, right, those flashy tricks. Let's keep watching how he counter-trolls. Then we have to ask him, in the air, this car has no tire friction, so will its brakes fail? When such a heavy car lands, will it cause the rear wheels to collapse? Secondly, he wants to use a Chinese name—

What is the breaking point for clear-headed Chinese netizens? It's not that Chinese cars are far behind or not leading the way, but rather: can this car's future really be implemented in China? Won't everyone try to evade tolls? For example, in Taiwan, we use ETC for automatic recognition without stopping, passing through a gate to pay tolls, right? But on highways in China, you have to stop to pay tolls, and there are barriers. In fact, many car owners have shared dashcam footage showing that many Chinese people evade tolls. Once, as I was getting ready to enter the automatic recognition area where the barrier lifts, the car next to me suddenly cut in front of me and passed through, using my license plate to pay and pass. That means I have to pay twice—I'll have to pay twice when I exit the interchange, right? So, if in the future this kind of car is widely cleared for use and can fly, like this Tesla entering the market, many Chinese netizens made memes mocking it: it's over, will all the toll booths on Chinese highways be equipped with machine guns, artillery, and Dongfeng missiles? The Eastern Theater Command's Rocket Force will finally find their calling, and instead of attacking Taiwan, they'll attack the Chinese people themselves. I can only say that Chinese people understand Chinese people best. In the future, toll booth signs in China won't change from "Please slow down and reduce speed" to "Please do not maliciously take off" and "Suspected of endangering national security, emergency landing service fee." If it directly lands in China, it will definitely be a castrated version. You know Apple phones are also castrated versions in China because Xi Jinping is afraid, because Xi Jinping worries about what you might do with these things that would be detrimental to his regime. He really is that worried. Look at that—within a 300-kilometer radius around Beijing, even your pride and joy, DJI drones, are prohibited from taking off and being bought or sold, and even spare parts are prohibited from being bought and sold. He doesn't even trust domestic DJI, so would he trust a flying Tesla? In the future, the conspiracy theories from Zhongnanhai's bedchamber whisperers will add one more thing: Elon Musk joining a coup with a flying Tesla.

Let's take a look at the fate of various Chinese domestic car brands and those launched in other countries. I still feel that you get what you pay for. People are always bragging about how cheap things made in China are. You know that their cheapness comes from Chinese workers, from low-wage Chinese labor combined with powerful social security, and from the quality sacrificed through layers of exploitation. Of course it's cheap, what else? OK, and if problems occasionally occur, you take it in for repairs. As soon as you drive it out of the shop, it's the exact same problem. So this is very obvious—you guys can't find where the problem is. When you roll out this feature, it should naturally be placed on the outside. Since it's placed on the outside, it should be dust-proof, wind-proof, and rain-proof, right, without affecting its driving and the AI functionality of automatic recognition. You can't even do this. So look at how China is leading the way—even the brakes can be pressed until they snap, not to mention that wheels can actually detach directly from the car body while driving. This is not a movie special effect, but a real accident that recently happened in Johor Bahru, Malaysia. A 2023 Omoda 5 was driving along when its rear trailing arm suddenly fractured, and the rear axle along with both rear wheels directly detached from the car body. This is the serious consequence of a Chinese car brand being launched in Malaysia. And after many Chinese brand cars have accidents, they pull the same stunts as they do domestically—even like this picture, where cars involved in accidents are covered up so people can't see which brand it is. As a consumer, when I bought my car, I was a distinguished Tank 700 owner. Now that the car has problems, it's just the distinguished Tank 700 manufacturer. Tank 700 Zhu Huifei? The daughter of this channel's Director of the Pink Neighborhood Committee. While driving, the car suddenly lost acceleration, meaning it stalled, and then it got scorching hot here, which is definitely scary. So I frantically called for help, I troubleshooted all kinds of situations, some of which I had, and I could handle them. Well, I had things the car didn't have at all. Porsche's factory certainly cannot compare to Jianghuai's factory; you guys shouldn't think I'm talking nonsense, because I've visited it, you know? Just now they were bragging that whatever Tesla has, they have everything, and what it doesn't have, they also have. That brand is China's domestic NIO, which has lost over 500 billion yuan for 8 consecutive years. Even outsiders say it's on the verge of bankruptcy and about to fail, and now people are even renting instead of buying. Which time does it not break down or have an accident? This time, Tesla is definitely taking off maliciously. American capitalism is using rocket technology to maliciously undermine the patriotic sentiment of China's automotive industry.

I am truly terrified right now. What if in a few days, some patriotic influencers suddenly start analyzing why a Tesla can fly, claiming it exposes the truth that the American automotive industry is on the verge of collapse and that the US is finished? But I want to ask those who talk about being 'far ahead' all day: before, when American cars couldn't fly, you said China was leading. Now that American cars can actually fly, will you change your tune and say, 'We Chinese are pragmatic, we don't do these flashy things; we don't need to fly'? Some even sarcastically say, 'We don't need to fly, we just need to understand Confucianism, as long as our Dongfeng missiles can fly, that's enough.' And the most embarrassing thing right now is that the week before Tesla showcased this flying car, a Chinese luxury car—a million-yuan class vehicle, equivalent to nearly 4 million New Taiwan Dollars, which we shared last week—had its brake system fail on three separate cars. This is the AITO M9 (Wenjie M9) developed by Huawei and JAC. While American car manufacturers are researching how cars can take off and land safely, this million-yuan class Chinese brand now has to explain to everyone why the brake pedal snapped during testing, claiming it was because you 'maliciously stepped on it.' Others are using SpaceX rocket thrusters, while you guys are back to researching the most basic brake system that cars should have had 100 or 200 years ago. Think about it: even if you buy a car under 1 million in Taiwan today, the absolute basic requirement is that the brakes shouldn't snap; it doesn't even need to have autonomous driving, right? Yet, the arguments from some Chinese netizens are very interesting, saying the test was too extreme and that normal people wouldn't slam on the brakes. Really? Then I must refute you: you are wrong. China doesn't need brakes at all. Remove them entirely! China needs to forge ahead at full speed. If anyone shouts 'brake' at this moment, they are the enemy of all Chinese people, someone obstructing the great rejuvenation of China, a historical sinner of the Chinese nation. If you choose the right people and walk the right path, you must accelerate to the end. You must be 'Taiwan independence' supporters, 'Bluebirds,' 'Black Bears,' or 'Ocean Currents,' right? Or viewers of Bayiong, paper effigies smearing the motherland. So, I suggest that future Chinese cars should launch an AI voice feature: when you Little Pinks see an elderly woman staging a 'crash-for-cash' scam ahead, you are not allowed to hit the brakes. She is 'kindly' staging a scam, how can you 'maliciously' brake? At this moment, the AI voice in your car will say, 'Respected car owner, your current braking force may exceed the acceptable range of the brand's public relations department. Please sign the patriotic consent form first before slowly and gently pressing the brake pedal.' The most amazing thing about humanity is our infinite imagination. Even if we realize just one out of a hundred imaginative ideas, it is progress for mankind. But in China? Four central departments are working together to crack down—not only on Huawei, but also on Chinese netizens, Little Pinks, Dongchedi, taking down original videos, deleting discussions that are too popular or even satirical of the CCP, and even suing netizens. I really want to invent a new technology for the Chinese automotive industry called the 'Legal Department Turbocharger System.' Warning! Warning! A negative video or critical comment has appeared 300 meters ahead. The legal advisor has been ejected and is taking off; the legal notice is entering their home in supersonic mode. Isn't this technology even more awesome than Musk's? That's why some Chinese netizens posted comments saying: others are researching technology, while China is researching how to mess with people and how to persecute them.

However, after telling so many jokes, I still want to seriously talk about one thing. The live demonstration of flight stunts—of course, this doesn't mean this car can truly take off and fly freely on the road daily today. It must comply with relevant regulations, and safety, maintenance, and insurance issues must be resolved. But look at how they are indeed taking step-by-step actions to turn fantasy into reality. Where does this greatest drive come from? The government does not interfere with your creativity. How are the US and China handling AI? I will use the most stinging metaphor: we all know that gunpowder was first invented on this land of China. But when gunpowder was introduced to Europe, Europeans were researching how to make gunpowder more powerful, deriving more new versions of firearms, artillery, and machine guns. As a result, what was China doing? Every regime and every state on this land of China was researching how to make the patterns, shapes, and colors of fireworks more beautiful. This land is forever afraid that the development of technological progress might react and overthrow, or become a weapon to overthrow the regime, right? So this is also why, ever since the Qin unification, this land of China has basically only had progress and development in literature, and even this literary progress was developed under the irony of literary inquisitions, with room for individual interpretation and imagination. Many technologies, physics, and chemistry—if you compare it to the Renaissance, how can you compare? We are the same even now. The US uses AI to promote technological development, corporate organization, production optimization, and other innovations. As a result, most of what China uses it for is to make short videos, causing a bunch of actors to lose their jobs. That is exactly the metaphor of fireworks versus firearms development I just mentioned. Will the brake pedal bracket of a car suddenly become incredibly hard just because you are patriotic? If it really could, why not just make all your cars display the five-star red flag, and the moment you open the door, it plays 'Without the Communist Party, There Would Be No New China,' and you sing along all the way until you get out of the car? Wouldn't that be it? Car owners, don't worry, our car is equipped with the patriotic spirit of 1.4 billion people. Upon impact, it will automatically generate an airbag of national pride, forming a 7-layer protective cushion.

Finally, I want to call on all the pro-CCP Chinese Little Pinks: actually, this time the US is just showing off flashy but useless skills. Next year, any of your new cars will definitely surpass it. Buy more stocks related to Chinese automobiles, invest more money to become a 'leek' in the A-share market, and call on Xi Jinping to invest more fiscal tax revenue to fill the gap and develop China's automotive industry to compete with the US and win back face for China. As long as you invest one trillion yuan in every field and every track, after the 21st National Congress, your various industries will absolutely be far ahead of the US. And you won't follow in the footsteps of the Soviet Union, engaging in vicious competition with the US and eventually going bankrupt and collapsing. You won't. Keep it up, you must invest money! The video ends here today. If you like it, remember to subscribe to me; if you don't like it, make sure to block me. I am Bajiong. See you next time, bye. That's amazing, holy shit! Did you see this Tesla Roadster launch event? My god, the history of the automotive industry will take today as a dividing point. Everything before is history; the future has arrived. Oh my, what is there left to play with? This thing can even fly, this thing can even... what the fuck is this???